Do You Know How To Parent a Teen?

Epstein Teen Parenting Inventory (ETPI) v. 1.1, © 2012-2019, Dr. Robert Epstein  

You are about to take the Epstein Teen Parenting Inventory (or ETPI). Designed by Dr. Robert Epstein (follow on Twitter at @DrREpstein), one of America's most distinguished research psychologists, this is a comprehensive inventory of twelve important skills parents need for raising happy, healthy, cooperative teens or pre-teens. The content of the test is based on an extensive body of scientific research summarized in Dr. Epstein's recent book, Teen 2.0: Saving Our Children and Families from the Torment of Adolescence.

Most people are able to complete the test in less than 30 minutes, and there are no right or wrong answers. Just select the response that seems best. After you answer all the questions, you will be given a detailed report that will give you your scores and explain what they mean. This is just the start; once you know your ETPI scores, there are many avenues you might pursue to improve your parenting skills.

If you are conducting research and would like to collect raw data for a group that is taking this test - for a business, research study, classroom activity, or other purpose - please see our Group Testing Instructions

NEW! If you know a young person who is depressed, angry, or defiant, he or she might be suffering from Extended Childhood Disorder. Find out at ExtendedChildhoodDisorder.com.

Before we get to the inventory itself, we'll ask you a few basic questions about yourself. Demographic information is being collected for research purposes only and will be kept strictly confidential.

To make sure the scoring is accurate, be sure to fill in all the blanks!

*Required response

Group code (if applicable):

*First name and last initial: *Age:  -Select- 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 or over
*Highest Degree: None High School Associates College Masters Doctorate	*Race/Ethnicity: White Black Hispanic Asian American Indian Other	*Gender: Male Female Other	*Sexual Orientation: Straight Gay or lesbian Bisexual Other

*How fluent are you in English?
Not fluent   1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  Very fluent

*Are you a parent?
No  Yes

*How many children have you had?
1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10+ 

*Have you ever been married?
No  Yes

*Are you currently married?
No  Yes

*Have you ever been divorced?
No  Yes

*If you are a parent, how long have you been one?
Years:  Months: 

*On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is the highest, how happy have your children been (on average)?
Low   1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  High

*On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is the highest, how healthy have your children been (on average)?
Low   1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  High

*On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is the highest, how successful have your children been in school or work settings (on average)?
Low   1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  High

*On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is the highest, how good has your relationship been with your children (on average)?
Low   1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  High

*On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is the highest, how good a parent do you think you are?
Low   1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  High

*Have you had any training or education in parenting?
No  Yes

*If so, approximately how many hours of training or education have you had?


If a teacher, counselor, physician or other professional suggested that you take this test, please identify him or her, as well as his or her institutional affiliation.


Thanks! Now here is the test itself:

For each of the following questions, select the answer that best applies to you.


*1. I often feel stressed over my teen’s behavior.
Agree             Disagree


*2. I’ve tried to teach my teen not to behave impulsively.
Agree             Disagree


*3. I always encourage my teen to respect the religious beliefs of others.
Agree             Disagree


*4. I sometimes restrict my teen’s access to television, video games, or the computer.
Agree             Disagree


*5. I often get drawn in to shouting matches with my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*6. I have always tried to teach my teen to maintain positive and constructive relationships with other people.
Agree             Disagree


*7. I encourage my teen to live a moral life.
Agree             Disagree


*8. I’ve encouraged my teen to do meaningful volunteer work.
Agree             Disagree


*9. I come down hard on my teen when I find out he or she is engaging in risky behavior (like drug use, sex, or drinking).
Agree             Disagree


*10. I try to avoid self-destructive ways of dealing with stress, such as drinking or taking drugs.
Agree             Disagree


*11. When I make commitments or promises, I make sure to honor them.
Agree             Disagree


*12. I encourage my teen to read.
Agree             Disagree


*13. I am always there to help, advise, and console my teen regarding his or her personal relationships.
Agree             Disagree


*14. When discussing issues, I try to show my teen the same respect I would show another adult.
Agree             Disagree


*15. I try to make sure that my teen gets restful and adequate sleep.
Agree             Disagree


*16. When in a relationship, I often have trouble resolving conflicts with my partner.
Agree             Disagree


*17. If I learned that my teen was a homosexual, I would try to be supportive.
Agree             Disagree


*18. My teen is not a child.
Agree             Disagree


*19. I often feel suspicious and accuse my teen of engaging in risky behaviors even if I don’t have a reason to.
Agree             Disagree


*20. I frequently encourage my teen to express his or her creativity.
Agree             Disagree


*21. I set a good example for my teen by regularly participating in spiritual or religious activities.
Agree             Disagree


*22. I am careful never to say negative things to my teen about other people who are important in his or her life.
Agree             Disagree


*23. I maintain good hygiene.
Agree             Disagree


*24. It drives me crazy that my teen won’t tell me anything about his or her private life.
Agree             Disagree


*25. I encourage my teen to exercise regularly.
Agree             Disagree


*26. Generally speaking, I trust my teen’s judgment when it comes to risky behaviors.
Agree             Disagree


*27. I exercise regularly.
Agree             Disagree


*28. I’ve never hit my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*29. I try to teach my teen constructive ways of reducing and managing stress.
Agree             Disagree


*30. If I learned that my teen daughter was pregnant, I would try to be supportive.
Agree             Disagree


*31. I sometimes threaten to take away my teen’s property, such as his or her cell phone.
Agree             Disagree


*32. When I set rules for my teen, I usually enlist his or her help in both making the rules and in specifying the consequences for breaking them.
Agree             Disagree


*33. I try to get involved in healthful outdoor activities.
Agree             Disagree


*34. When in a relationship, I often have trouble communicating with my partner.
Agree             Disagree


*35. I make sure my teen isn’t falling behind in school by helping with his or her homework and doing the assignments completely if need be.
Agree             Disagree


*36. I think about and plan for the future.
Agree             Disagree


*37. When I penalize my teen, I always make sure that he or she has some way to earn back what was lost.
Agree             Disagree


*38. I generally treat my teen like an adult.
Agree             Disagree


*39. To keep my teen away from dangerous household items (such as liquor or prescription drugs or power tools), I’ve threatened severe punishment for going near them.
Agree             Disagree


*40. I’m generally willing to give my teen more adult responsibilities just as soon as he or she shows me he or she can handle them.
Agree             Disagree


*41. Out of concern for my teen’s health and appearance, I frequently insist that my teen eat only certain foods.
Agree             Disagree


*42. I encourage my teen to look for challenging work experiences that might develop his or her fullest potential.
Agree             Disagree


*43. I’m good at controlling my impulses when I need to.
Agree             Disagree


*44. When my teen breaks a rule in our house, I often ask him or her to say what the consequence should be.
Agree             Disagree


*45. To manage my stress, I regularly practice relaxation techniques such as meditation, breathing, or imagery exercises.
Agree             Disagree


*46. To keep my teen safe, I sometimes forbid him or her from leaving our home.
Agree             Disagree


*47. I always support my teen’s decisions, even when I don’t agree with them.
Agree             Disagree


*48. I manage money well.
Agree             Disagree


*49. To make sure my teen feels comfortable telling me about sensitive topics (like drug use), I’ve tried hard to maintain a positive relationship with him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*50. Rather than hiding dangerous household items from my teen, I’ve advised him or her about their proper use.
Agree             Disagree


*51. I try not to apply stereotypes about teens to my own teen.
Agree             Disagree


*52. To protect my teen’s future, I enforce strict rules about his or her personal appearance (for example, by forbidding him or her from wearing certain clothes or getting piercings or tattoos).
Agree             Disagree


*53. When my teen and I disagree about something, I try not to talk down to him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*54. I don’t expect my teen to perform perfectly in school—just to put in his or her best effort.
Agree             Disagree


*55. I expect my teen to take full responsibility for his or her negative behavior—not to make excuses or pass the blame.
Agree             Disagree


*56. I often do things my teen asks for because I am afraid of his or her reaction when I say “no.”
Agree             Disagree


*57. When my teen demands that I help him or her engage in risky behaviors (for example, by buying him or her alcohol), I sometimes give in.
Agree             Disagree


*58. I encourage my teen to maintain good hygiene.
Agree             Disagree


*59. When in a relationship, I try not to argue with my partner in front of my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*60. I plan and prioritize my life so that I experience less stress.
Agree             Disagree


*61. To keep my teen safe, I’m very strict with him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*62. When my teen does something wrong, I try to reassure him or her that I still care about him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*63. II’ve encouraged my teen to think about setting up his or her own business or non-profit organization.
Agree             Disagree


*64. I am always available for my teen when he or she needs advice.
Agree             Disagree


*65. I keep a close eye on my teen—for example, by sometimes searching his or her room or checking the contents of his or her cell phone.
Agree             Disagree


*66. I often find myself overwhelmed by stress.
Agree             Disagree


*67. If I learned that my teen was dating someone of another race, I would try to be supportive.
Agree             Disagree


*68. When in a relationship, I have no trouble apologizing to my partner or forgiving my partner.
Agree             Disagree


*69. As far as I’m concerned, my teen does not have a right to privacy.
Agree             Disagree


*70. I rarely get restful and adequate sleep.
Agree             Disagree


*71. I always try to maintain a positive relationship with my teen’s other parent.
Agree             Disagree


*72. I try to put a positive spin on things so that I don’t get so upset about them.
Agree             Disagree


*73. I am open about sharing my religious and spiritual beliefs with my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*74. No matter how busy I am, I try to spend quality time with my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*75. I’ve tried to teach my teen to stay organized.
Agree             Disagree


*76. I encourage my teen to get involved in healthful outdoor activities.
Agree             Disagree


*77. When my teen screws up, I sometimes ground him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*78. To get my point across, I sometimes need to lecture, nag, or shout at my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*79. I often encourage my teen to tell me how he or she is feeling.
Agree             Disagree


*80. I support my teen’s spiritual development through special schooling or other means.
Agree             Disagree


*81. I praise my teen for his or her strengths far more than I criticize my teen for his or her weaknesses.
Agree             Disagree


*82. I try to make sure that I always have complete control over my teen’s behavior.
Agree             Disagree


*83. I will talk with my teen only if he or she is willing to speak with me in a calm and mature manner.
Agree             Disagree


*84. I try to serve healthful meals at home and to encourage my teen to eat healthful foods.
Agree             Disagree


*85. I rarely try to control my teen’s behavior.
Agree             Disagree


*86. To protect my teen’s future, I always take an active role in every aspect of his or her education—for example, by talking with teachers or researching colleges.
Agree             Disagree


*87. When I disapprove of a possible romantic mate for my teen, I express my concerns but leave the decisions up to my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*88. I’ve encouraged my teen to choose his or her own profession.
Agree             Disagree


*89. I have trouble maintaining a positive relationship with my teen’s other parent.
Agree             Disagree


*90. I’ve tried to teach my teen to prioritize.
Agree             Disagree


*91. I often turn my teen down when he or she asks for help on something I know he or she can handle without me.
Agree             Disagree


*92. I always aim to advise my teen rather than tell him or her exactly what to do.
Agree             Disagree


*93. I have never sworn at my teen or called him or her a bad name.
Agree             Disagree


*94. I sometimes nag or criticize my teen for not completing chores.
Agree             Disagree


*95. I try to encourage my teen to think about and plan for the future.
Agree             Disagree


*96. I keep my home clean and well organized.
Agree             Disagree


*97. I encourage my teen to get good grades.
Agree             Disagree


*98. I treat my teen in a way that is appropriate to his or her maturity level and abilities.
Agree             Disagree


*99. I usually clean up after my teen instead of asking him or her to do it.
Agree             Disagree


*100. I never participate in spiritual or religious activities.
Agree             Disagree


*101. I occasionally struggle with serious bad habits, such as alcoholism, drug abuse, or gambling.
Agree             Disagree


*102. I sometimes do nice things for my teen just because I love him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*103. I often try to find ways to reduce the sources of stress in my life.
Agree             Disagree


*104. When I disapprove of a possible romantic mate for my teen, I forbid him or her from seeing that person.
Agree             Disagree


*105. To keep my teen in line, I have occasionally hit him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*106. If I learned that my teen was dating someone of another religion, I would try to be supportive.
Agree             Disagree


*107. I generally get restful and adequate sleep.
Agree             Disagree


*108. I’m determined to make sure that my teen will enter a specific profession that I have in mind for him or her.
Agree             Disagree


*109. I try to teach my teen to honor his or her commitments and promises.
Agree             Disagree


*110. I often give my teen adult responsibilities like taking care of siblings or elders or fixing things around the house.
Agree             Disagree


*111. I encourage my teen to set legitimate professional goals for him or herself, and I try to be supportive of those goals.
Agree             Disagree


*112. I always provide adequate food, clothing, and shelter for my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*113. I always try to teach my teen how to be safe when engaging in potentially risky activities.
Agree             Disagree


*114. If my teen had a serious emotional or mental health problem, I would enlist the help of a counselor, teacher, or other expert to help me solve it.
Agree             Disagree


*115. I make sure my teen is safe by giving him or her a strict curfew.
Agree             Disagree


*116. I expect my teen to get perfect grades in every subject.
Agree             Disagree


*117. I always refer to my teen as a young adult rather than a child or kid.
Agree             Disagree


*118. I rarely encourage my teen to tell me how he or she is feeling.
Agree             Disagree


*119. I encourage my teen to have meaningful interactions with responsible adults.
Agree             Disagree


*120. I encourage my teen to make decisions for him- or herself.
Agree             Disagree


*121. I always show my teen that I'm listening carefully by expressing interest in what he or she is saying.
Agree             Disagree


*122. I always try to support my teen's participation in legitimate spiritual or religious activities.
Agree             Disagree


*123. I only reward my teen with things because he or she has earns them, not because he or she demands them.
Agree             Disagree


*124. I make of point of paying attention to and praising my teen’s accomplishments.
Agree             Disagree


*125. When my teen talks to me about sensitive matters, I try to be supportive and not to judge.
Agree             Disagree


*126. I have a healthy diet.
Agree             Disagree


*127. I am aware of my teen’s extraordinary ability to learn new things.
Agree             Disagree


*128. My partner and I always try to agree upon how to parent our teen.
Agree             Disagree


*129. I participate with my teen in the celebration of religious holidays or other religious or spiritual events.
Agree             Disagree


*130. I’ve taught my teen how to handle money, and I trust him or her to handle money responsibly.
Agree             Disagree


*131. I never put down or insult my teen.
Agree             Disagree


*132. If my teen did something terrible, depending on the seriousness of the act, I might enlist the help of a counselor, teacher, or even the police.
Agree             Disagree


*133. I encourage my teen to work for the money he or she wants, rather than just giving him or her the money.
Agree             Disagree


*134. I always treat my teen as a unique human being.
Agree             Disagree


*135. Out of concern for my teen’s future, I insist that he or she practice my religion and no other.
Agree             Disagree


*136. I try to teach my teen how to solve problems on his or her own.
Agree             Disagree


*137. I'm always available to answer my teen’s spiritual questions.
Agree             Disagree


*138. I tend to interpret things negatively.
Agree             Disagree


*139. When it comes to romantic relationships, I try to set a good example for my teen by maintaining a great relationship with my own partner.
Agree             Disagree


*140. I encourage my teen to clean up after him- or herself.
Agree             Disagree